A Car Arrives

Every time a lorry goes past I rush to the window in the hope that my car will be waiting on a trailer outside. I had used an auction site for car deliveries and was impressed by the price, £150 from Nottingham to Hampshire.

The car arrived that evening. I asked if I could assist with the offload or if I would just get in the way. The latter was insinuated so I retired inside to a coffee and my Haynes classic car restoration manual.

Within 30 minutes the car was sitting on the drive and with much eagerness I retrieved the keys and went outside. As I approached the car I realised what I had taken on. It would be unfair to say the car looks a mess. From several hundred yards away and squinting it actually looks ready to go but the reaction of people as they wander over to have a look is probably more telling

'Nice car', 50 metres away

'Thanks'.

'I haven't seen one of these in a while', 40 metres 'I remember it used to be on that TV show didn't it', 30 metres.

'The Saint, yes', 20 metres.
'They're good looking......',10 metres 'cars..... ',5 metres 'usually. This is a lot of work'
Cue me, enthusiastically saying that is is a lot of work but that I plan to have it running by Christmas.

'Have you done anything like this before?'
'Nope'
'It needs a lot of welding, done any welding?'
'I bought a welder'
'OK'

They usually walk off then, glancing over their shoulder to make sure I'm not foll0wing them.

Back to starting.

Keys in, ignition turn. sans response. Bonnet up, no battery. To Halfords.
Buy battery, attach battery, turn key, car clicks.
Google 'car clicks', discover that a flat battery or poor connection is the cause.
Charge battery, tighten terminals, turn key, starter turns over, hurrah, engine doesn't start.
Check light levels, getting dark, neighbours peering through curtains at the madman, go to bed.